Mrs. Dunne

She claims there’s no such thing
as a “cool girl.”
That no woman really fits that mold.
That any female who likes
sports and heels,
burgers and filets,
base and high-minded humor,
and truly enjoys both giving and receiving
in the bedroom —
she’s kidding herself.
She’s only pretending to like these things
until she lands a man,
and then she can stop this business
of being the “cool girl”
and be the thing she said she wasn’t.
She’s just giving him what he wants
until he gives her what she wants.
She’s only doing it so she can win
(and he, necessarily, can lose).

But oh, Mrs. Dunne!
Allow me introduce myself
and much of my inner circle!
We don’t call ourselves that,
but we do what you can’t —
we act exactly as ourselves.
We’re not pretending.
And in the end, we probably win —
but he’s not the one who loses.


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